"You're my satellite You're riding with me tonight Passenger side, lighting the sky
Always the first star that I find You're my satellite.
Maybe you will always be Just a little out of reach..." ~Guster That is for my mom since she's not around but I know she's there. It makes sense
School has started up and I'm ready to start learning again but that'll start tomorrow when we really start taking the crazy notes and reading all the time. School is diffrent this year. I think it's because I'm off campus and not dealing with all the diffrent rules and living with the people I lived with last year. It's weird i can't just walk next door to see a friend I've gotta drive. Don't get me wrong I love it here at Carrera but it's totally diffrent than the past two years. I haven't even really seen a lot of the people I wanted to being back...eventually.
This weekend was my realization of loss. My family isn't here. It was really hard this weekend because everyone in the house was gone home or were with their families. I was the one left out just laying in my room. I know they didn't realize how depressed and sad I was but that's okay I don't expect them to. I really want to see my family and hug my mom and brothers but I can't do that anymore on the weekend. I was jealous and wished that everyone realized how great they have it. Being able to see their family is something most of them take for granted. I know I did, but now I just want everyone to know how lucky they really are. I might go over to the mckinney's just so I have something of a family or maybe even go see nick. I don't know it sucks and at night when everyone is asleep I hug my stuffed little foot and my prince charming stuffed frog tight and just cry myself to sleep. It's the adjusting period that sucks and i'm starting the adjusting. But if I don't want to adjust and have my family with me, eventually will it work?
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