Work schmork

"Young and full of running, tell me where has it taken me? Just a great figure 8 or a tiny infinity? Love is really nothing but a dream that keeps waking me, for all my trying we still end up dying, how can that be? Don't say a word just come over and lie here with me, cause just about to set fire to everything I see."-Edge of Desire

So life has been interesting lately. Well I guess it's just what comes with the territory of my life. Right when you think everything is going great there is a giant curve ball thrown your way. I'm starting to be able to hit those curve balls out of the park.

I'm the only one right now with a job. It's a very weird and odd feeling to have in a house full of people. Maybe I'm not the happiest person when I get home, but when I'm fake smiling and trying to act like I care, it gets draining. I am really not liking a lot of things about my job now. I'm doing my best to make it fun for me but it's getting to the point where nothing is working.

Here's coming some-real-honest-my-gut-feelings-truth, so if you're not up for it stop reading now. You were warned.

Issue number one: I am a white female.
I work at a place that is predominately male. Also I am the minority. Everyone is african american. Nothing is wrong with that, but when you work at a place where the culture is completely different it is very hard. African American people at my store seem to stick together, white people are left out. For example, there was a cookout this weekend, who was invited every one but the white kids. Even if we showed up, we'd feel very out of place. Don't get me wrong, some people I work with are very accepting of the fact that we are from completely opposite spectrums of the world. But would they call me up to hang out at any point, nope. The racial barrier here is very evident. This point is proven by "it's a black thing" or "go help your cousin over there (in reference to another white person in the store)"

Now onto the female part. There are only 7 girls total that work on the sales floor at my store. Half of them barely even work. I am one of the few that are viewed as a leader in the store. I have worked hard to get where I am and I work with a bunch of asshole guys. Some who are just ignorant to the fact that a girl can be in power over them. A few are just plain rude to me, to my face. It's not cool. I have worked for this company a lot long than they have and know how this place is supposed to work. I know how to run a department the right way. I don't need you to ask me constantly what I'm doing, or ignorning me when I ask you to do something. Because I don't play video games like they do, I miss out on things. They all bond and talk over the game every night. My supervisor does things he should, since they game together they have their click. Breaking into that is never a fun thing, and they talk crap about you behind your back. Most of them aren't able to handle a smart intelligent girl in control. I believe most of them are suprised to see a girl not roll over at any single command they give. Get used to it boys, I'm not going to back down for anyone.

Issue Number Two: Management
We have gone through 3 managers in the past 6 months. The newest one is what I refer to as the red neck jersey shore general manager. He's got the gel in the hair, gold chain around his neck, and the terrible southern accent. He does not know how to run the store. Nobody is happy and living in fear of him, because he can fire any one of us for wearing the wrong shoes that day. Other managers have changed and have become very negative. A place that once was a family has become everyone for themselves. Doing what they can to make sure their butts are covered. It's all about what they can get out of me, never what they can do to help me out. They ultimately are the ones who have made me hate my job. It's no longer fun, no longer enjoyable. It's all about how we suck and we're the worst thing possible.

So what have I done to fix the situation? I've applied for a new job (the resume and application went out yesterday:: WISH ME LUCK), that covers a bunch of things that are awesome. 1) It actually uses my degree 2) Pays very well and benefits are great 3)I am with sports and kids all day, who wouldn't love doing that job? 4) I'd be the boss!


I've missed this blogging thing, I'm going to try to get back into the swing of the things and write more. Things to write about at a later date:: My non-existant love live, My concert musings and music in my world aka Silver Bullet, my life in general.

Much love to you tonight and every night.

p.s. Are you happy now mom?!

My love for Mr. John Mayer, he some times comes up with some amazing quotes on life. Thinking of getting my blog game back on....maybe, we'll see.